This picture is just ..
oh .. crazy face .. hey there’s a crazy guy down there figure lower left
grinning teeth .. okay .. look at you, and then his head has popped off to the
right, and somehow is emitting ether of a better day.
Okay.
Glad you explained that.
-
But thankful, as we all
should be, to have a house to live in, to have food in the cupboard, and sweat,
do some work to see if the inner story you build through meditation can
subsidize your waking hours, is it really real, a hard exercise session, 2 and
a half hours steady, can a story in your inner self really make a difference/
-
Hey this is no fly by
night, been doing the meditation for 14 years now, it takes 2 to 3 hours every
morning, hard to work my way up to that, quite a killer, to sit with your inside,
face it, quite a killer. And sometimes
it’s 4 hours. And sometimes I do it twice
a day. /Doing it at sunset clears out
stale chi, the energy, inside you “not really a medical energy” “but from somewhere
else” can assist medical health, but is rarely talked of .. /but a session in
the morning brings in fresh chi. The
energy. Can keep you going for a long
long time. Ah, subsidize it all. But yeah here’s what I wrote down after the exercise
session and after I had taken a shower.
But yeah this “blog” oh
I give a little, there’s much more left out – but you know, it’s kind of interesting
practice, for any human being – many of us have just had it – you reach a
certain age, I’m 53, but you should just be dead. Seriously, things have happened, the pain in
your heart is like a little munchkin gathering knives looping arms around
picking up knives gonna kill itself, stab the heart, by the heart – oh let’s be
playful let’s not take that image seriously, thank you.
So here’s the writing,
after exercise session, thanks.
I am thankful I can
keep going.
-
//
7:30 pm (this was earlier, it is now 9:20 pm, Sunday,
June 29, 2014)
So I did an exercise
session, yah eric! My hero! All ours hero! yeah sure okay gather around. Hmm.
Anyways, thankful just to be able to do it. The story in me, you know? was available, was
adaptable, matched, to exercise, /sometimes the story refuses it, it’s just the
way it is. So it took me 2 hours 27
minutes tonight. It was good, sweat
dripping – was soaked, shirt hanging there, soaked wet with sweat. Hey for my compatriots anywhere, this is for
you, want to exercise, can’t, are in a place, can’t, all the reasons. Hey no air conditioning on here today. Relate to you, kept in.
So, here’s some stuff I
wrote down during it. “You are in the
cell. /
Exercise for them. / You’re better off, not by much. / Hang
on. //
Never get out of it. / For them, in there. / You
remember that? (meaning here, at this point, a bit farther on, I was asking
myself if I was in a tight situation, scary, had it, no one to depend on, alone
.. you go down .. it could happen, whispers, looks, wolves .. but to remember
the eotu and the prayer being, please remember.
/You in there, some of you, not meant to be in there, you’re a good
person, just lost your way.) You
remember the eotu and prayer being? In
your hell? (no I didn’t have the eotu and prayer being back then when I was in
prison. But my mother prayed for me
every day. And I believe my dad did too. Something got me through. I am here today. Doing this.
But don’t forget my roots, the horror, the terror “by my own doing,”
some would say. Some would say.) / Stay
with them. Remember the prayer being and
eotu. And your hell. Work it.
/ Be alive. /
Fully. / For earth and sky and universe and
beyond. / Follow it all the way through, work it. / Your
discomfort here is the smiles there.
Feel it all. They are living. With your help and work. /
Living here. / Do it with the intent of an old man that’s
going to hang on a long long time.
/ The stink of sweat cleans off
your mind. / The happy little story. Get you going.”
-
/endf’ snippet/ 7:50 pm
