Ah we try our best not to be mean “who amongst us, are stupid and confident, who amongst us are doubtful, filled with doubts, scared, and intelligent?” and so life is, hold hands, sweaty palms, gunk, cicvaoocola spit gum meat fry meat gravy all of it stand in a big group circle sway
How do we meditate
On all of this
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Ah inside of us, be careful, like walk through a door, no one imagines they have .. go in .. what the fruginluck is this what luck see you for real yuck your inside insane impossible to place aside boxes, see edge of universe, see what’s really there.
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So that’s a couple of drawings short explanations leading into, here’s the rest.
Writing from offline, this morning, this afternoon, nah didn’t include this morning’s and didn’t include back through yesterday’s and how far, my fucking inside or practice, jittery present none of us do what none of us have.
To present legible lines straight nonwiggly nonbouncing all over the place stray dogs round up take for pretty perfumed walk.
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So here it is, earlier today, a long writing.
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Oh, I do okay. I realize some of my work is pretty jittery though, the mind “in full-flight jittery” often uncomfortable to watch, ah in each of us, we wish there was true peace, and often “true peace” is “false peace” but we’ll take it.
Little hints in the person that it’s not real peace.
We won’t ask about it.
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Oh we want to think it’s our minds acting up “oh a little false radar there” “shadup” you say to yourself, just enjoy the day, with the person, or people. A group. Who knows what you’re doing. Sailing. On a dirt road. Pretending, there’s water, or hiking ground, or life. It’s hard to get into, ask someone “do you feel, your body is false, and all it senses is false?” and they say “well, yes, I feel the eotu, and this created small art piece, if you will, we are just one being, it tests things out on, we believe we are thousands, even billions of people, we see them, we seem to think that is trustable verification ‘we know reality’ but alas we do not/ so yeah, Frank, thanks for bringing that up .. I am aware we are one being trying to see what having a body and seeing things around it is about, but then I fit back into being a separate body, my name is Jim, we are on a hiking trip, Carol and Sharon are with us too, and I just go by that. thank you.” ah, the advanced humans, able to locate themselves in all this.
Oh it often gets very confused, to realize human life, humans make messes, that need a small god, practical, that the human can feel, like a camp stove, like a good basic fixed-blade knife, to cut twigs, branches, trim fallen limbs, dried out, make a little fire, in a safe place, a campfire .. we need a “god” like that, that we know how to work – /the work is vicious, to get there, to realize what we truly are, we are held “to this notion of billions of bodies” “and each one pushing” “a lot of want for ‘scientific materialism,’ only trusting what is physical, the physical reality, as if there is nothing else”/ we hurt from that notion, it hurts a great deal, we are also used to snickers, people around us putting us down, if we dare mention the littlest thing, about unseen things being real too, assuming their form, invisible form – I mean, we’d be kicked out of where we are, the people would want us out of there. But if we have a big SUV, and the weather is really snowy, the snow is getting deep, you need that physical reality, and “god” “a little practical god” the eotu, someone good at that, voicing it, we truly don’t know the value of that /“that human lives are supposed to be messy” but that some of us are supposed to be able to see outside that, to see the being with a couple of colours blues, a couple of greens pencils apple green lime green a bit darker chrome green what are all the names ah meagre small child, create, you are ours our child, we are your children too, relax don’t push for more than simple things, in this understanding/ it takes a long time to get to that, human life seems full of complex details, whether welding metal, or heart surgery, washing dishes is tough, careful with the sharp edges, everything is real tough tough tough/ our view, the physical reality you kiss us with danger tiny details know them/ and yet in meditation coloured pencils by something not physical, oh .. as if our view is made up by our senses playing recording what they see hearty surgery/ hearty? Or not robust/ are those the wrong words, on we go/ details of writing, and something watching, within these lines/ there/ and no/ sewage disposal pee makeup lines of computercompanies on the contents failsafe fire alarm extinguisher exquisite, anything/ humans enraptured bedded by senses collapsed by senses see feel exist be a certain age sex gender person oaf hoo la la piss off embrace delicate assuage, the feelings of tasshushi-plabblooplo girl boy what was that man woman writer fool exist live are you sure you are what you are is taking that past theory into something, edge of universe talking quietly here on earth as something//, coloured pencils, they try truly, energy what the mind pictures it as, knocking on its door, oh the meditation position the abdominal breathing, the mind avoid selfish thoughts of the human host body, you, me, sitting there, moving into coloured pencils, ha hap, yeah/ with not many other colours, diminished, or may try a few more, if we get a bit more with hours hours of work take this story past nonplussed humans staring, can indeed feel this/ we and a black pen, run out of the matter, what’s the matter, has been using ballpoint only sense of physical all we are, it smears, sneers, what then? Where are we going goals with this> ah, just live life, and where are we going with that and then this any give more tiny terrible unknown flips danger to ease in deep meditation hours too much survive inner life top of the edge of universe go say sleet leap wet cold yap bar sail drink end saw a million words new ones we flop in rubber dingy out of there here .. how do you numdummeralobe up earring eerie play in sound tinkle, where you are, truly, what is this meditation “nuts stuff” for people caught in internet lawn lying university street the physical reality of get somewhere but must, just must, have not done the meditation, we call what is the trouble we have here they get in, then no resources, have not done the meditation, do you feel my wink in trouble words so they want their troubles fixed with oink only physical reality bacon smile tongue kiss – that can work fairly good, love me baby, some thugs intelligent patter wing it we are it works good enough stare on, but what happens when you get lost so bad, hold me here, you know the problems have done something to do with - - “what?” - - exactly what we see closer – what you are, little thing
You know someone should be able to help you, we see you there, but we can no one can.
We are talking areas past science plop it stares does not want a course/ and religion, past any talk, any objects screaming from them, or belief tardy tar maple from them .. it is very hard to make an actual prayer being sweet words past it all prayers talk be with me, that is “there” but not in “physical reality” / “the little thing, I can lift it to my hand show you her she can sit on the side of my hand I hold her up lightweight she looks peaceful, small, unlined, age and tuskawhoo bay out hound she smiles never did that smiles at me/ talk host human/ I will a little maybe later/ talk host human introduce me/ around the room as buzz, do you want her very straight sober no drugs had good sleep meditated is functioning as a fine human being, oh wait/ to sit on your bed, hospital behoves you to put out white cloth silverware minds caring you patient/ and respect that, and someone on the inside talk the group know how to let them guide that shaman witch doctor “which doctor did you say?”, when others don’t./ oh comma, oh baby, tell me, you are here tiny thing, prayer being, these tall letters, play human come visit me tell me this shit/ shift in But are aware that we need proper prollya this pro yeah expert fleece warm not steal, we can no longer just ash-ush for hush blank material things tubes stainless steel tic toc, and suck mint expect to live good lives, it is becoming really messy, the silence affordable dinner tables, I stand near, read this ... the mean silence, but also we try to pedal, men and women on bicycle, world, chain around, globe, suit gears “keep reading I like this” says suit patient/, has tired iof theurt social grsces, can’t do it any more,/ did you just spell wrong jitter your mouth/ really simebre / sombre I think that says/ yes grey times, grey mouth flipper scrum rug moods, soot on rake the place, no matter how many times you clean the world, house. Soot of mood, the mamn amd womsn can scruib ammd cvleam the gouse/ goose griouse amnd scrub amd cjean them people skin, it stays.
Doesn’t it, patient/The nood, no words to say, no experience in them, in thinking this, being comfirtsbke, someone in the grioyp gine through the torture of the mind desperstely staying to physical being really rude and powerful hurtful inside yourself sit listen all phones off door locked secretary told whywhen you try meditation, this is yiou head sdteve grey hairand past thst uis silenceopeasce.
Great pechere, as you are tired “a good workout” in medistion, 4 hours, who will do thst, you now, read a little, savour to see the true insude, hiw hellish it is, some daysm, fsce theur mind, wants to hurt them, insudem, no envymy, just themselves, ti be kind, furm, switch the mind ti something else place, when there seems tio be precious little. “something else place” So to see the eotu, the edge of universe, and see the prayer being, small little 10 inch being, walking on esrtyhm and humsn betweebn them, the humnsn making lunchness, selfishlunchnessno, pushym, war,like, rashe, pillsgem, women and men alike sit now “”something else place” logvo, get own collect buy be rych ast all cists, all cysts poppewomen and men, ownm use, esch other, thasn ask wjst the flemusck is mollusc so wrong craw, why are you crying? “We all use each other, that’s why, get used to it, no stay other/ – no we all dinlt use esch other, but some intellligent5 gentke people are full of doubts unsure skinny, there is no confidence in them this, they are pushing flat tire beyind whst is there, the physical reality roll only, and fnding whst truly is there, but they hsve no coincidence. mee Living ohysucally beig told ti gert ast it wotk obnky in thst you’ll be an outcast you wont be one of us as they work valiantly for harp solutions harp on whee fur all of us, in the incomfirtsbke, fscig your insude, which demise you sccess to the edge of the unipersoverse, and beyind thst, thst dyes hsve everythug ti do with us perver here on esrth.
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/endf’ snippet/ 6:15 pm
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So yes, it is a great chicken problem people are meek ouchwerful, too much thst tsckle this, esch day they hsve n confidence. It is like thst. quietly, they adapt, try .. they keep going, with no brsvsdo, swasjhbuvling in your cunfsce displays .. instesd hey do this work, fur whast we say, whst we dasre bring up in conversation. Hiw we think, relate, see the world around us, and get past our sowhatemses, our eartyh senses, our sense of be our body, amd its sorrounduingsm, nit onky go by thst, it is very hsrd, and it is very hard break through meditation pain 1,000’s of hours ttoo, to hsdve no support friom the physical-ralityonky railroad rationality people, who are suffering too only them oh all of us, but refuse any of this, look st youy likeyou;re insane – it is a rough world, basd psttern s, thst are askig/ here my face says this don’t swat me/ dir a little orsctucval giod, geode find druzy a little thing rock pretty, like a camp knfe, like a tsrp, to keep off the raon, ray-on like a dugm spaz raygun a friendly dig but strungm, the family oetm, but a member wet of the family .. west follow meditartion watch here and then tio ths, whast is going on this, a prsyer beigm sittig there now past skirmish we tried to not be heralded i-onto damnation viblee invisubky, thst lives from energy of conversation on this.
What .. I too tired to complkain object I lullabyed into sleepy vomitplacenc we okay I was so scarted I am clean now I keep a hold of less do what you willi trust tou to heal me
I ley go a lit of the craP
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/endf’ snippet/ 6:20 pm
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So end of that offline stuff here’s me back midline or whatever you call it .. but meditation filigree in pretty straight writing/ crazy stuff, right, eh? Ah we all walk around this like full laundry bags full of this writing just behind our faces, suck in a bit of air through a pinched sliver slice appraisal of you
Should we tell you>
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Now that we have it?
Any chance of having it so we could tell you?
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Fuck no leave it alone leave it in place – me as same old tiker tanker slop in sandbox slug go pancake and slide over the side just sit there hello as usual “I really like reading your writing though, eric”/ and so we go terrible changes shocking new hard to get used to ugly just getting settled into place then it will be pretty we don’t know that, we don’t take the chance, thanks for taking the chance, eric
Thanks
“how far are you in implementing this in your life, eric, saying it?”
“Not far.”
In my life you don’t say it either I haven’t met people you say it either .. well in odd arrangements I have met them a little
Buried deep in the book you’d have to dig for it, nothing strange, too strange to my mind/ ah people need distance, from a close book – they need the close book, the close person in the book, but not the person to show up at their door, talk – this is inside, the insane inside, the nice inside .. none of us know what it is, we are this far along in modern civilization and none of us know what this is
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