/
oh in ways of “what did you do?” “what did you just do?” all our lives, and the hero is damaged, you’re no hero, were already shy, not even thinking about a hero, and now even worse, who will lead, embarrassed? And all of us, tired, our reputations, our goals, still try to live by the credo “of how it was”/ if we could all stacked norweally fill in our place but still we yearn but for nithig cannot fuirm it out ti/ spell it right actions format letters say wise the side or up ahead in the clear no tools no thoughts fur that
So, here’s ome werutig from tiday. Thasnks.
Monday, October 14, 2013 1:05 pm
So, life. I did a smirgrabblek last night. It wasn’t very good. A lack of feeling. Like just my hard work at my insides, my inner world, anybody’s inner world, is very sad at it.
But I did it. Like a lousy human.
Yes I did.
Oh, the least of it, I mean, yes it’s bad, then next day a sadness, a regret, at losing chi, damaging it, working back up, ah, but a parity with us all, really, failures. And this position we’re all in. A land of doubts. Everywhere. We have all our systems in place, systems of money, systems of religion, politics, faith, groceries, food, sewer and water, electricity, hydro, whatever, all of it, and nothing .. past that. Just a quiet.
Into that quiet I enter.
Not really. We take a look at this, but we don’t do it. “We’re tired, Eric, we don’t do it.”
Respect us.
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/endf’ snippet/ 1:15 pm
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Oh some sadness at it all some tears letting too much out delicate “we don’t want to hear” “we don’t want to hear from each other in these ways” lonely, even if talkative, subjects not broached, and life, all the systems, even if sitting quietly by a mushroom pond, oh say that don’t say that come with me we are all so tired as a society, don’t want a hero, don’t want a leader.
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A bleak place read a little not a book please don’t make it a book don’t make it anything.
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/endf’ snippet/ 1:50 pm
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//
Yes life is like that then you feel a bit better, oh it’s 2:55 p.m. here, oh, I did do meditation today before that writing offline there, I did a 1+1 this morning, oh the magnification was long, I woke way too early, went to bed at I think 2, then woke at 8 o’clock ? So did start some magnification, then went back to bed, slept, thankfully, the chi, the magnification, putting me to sleep naturally, and contemplate and dream and be gentle .. so all in all, the magnification, the sit-down, 4 hours 25 minutes, oh good soothing, but difficult, yes first part of sit-down abdomen locked worried damaged you have to be patient feel sad for the world yourself .. all of us .. can’t stop .. damaging things .. do our best .. and me just a lack of words here, a bit dulled, from the effects of it all, smirgrabblek, damaging the chi .. but yes, we don’t need no hero, it’s a silent book, not a book, past all the great writings, higher powers, all over the world, texts, religious texts, and everything, life, pay attention to your religion, /pervert your religion, /and everything. Just live. And have no hope. The universal area, we combine in an area we can’t have. There are no words for it. This does a pretty good job of it. Join here, secretly read this, no reply, no sharing, we hope, we pray, for others to hear us in mind beams, bended beams, particles, moss, atoms/ who knows what, I will get to you, you will get to me, as this. Fairytales realistic all fairy dust taken away it is utterly realistic.
Can be done as we do nothing don’t take up pen and paper and draw or meet with papers and try at floating words. No. But we still agree.
It is a silent agreement in a tiredness past all known things.
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//
Is there a secret place we meet no I cannot meet your eyes on this, none of us can meet each other’s eyes on this the strange gentle weird wholesome “but not us” strange avoid area .. at all costs ..
And to develop be able to move into words floating in the air, ah what is the mechanism taught learned you meditate years and years .. ah we cannot we yearn we can feel it “just there” a different world, not for humans, to wear robes and chant, no, it’s just not for us
Ah alas
Our loss
To see it there, safe “ha! safe from us!” good
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//
Oh meditation it wears in the slow grind like working in a coal mine, it really is
I have no vaunted high-ceilinged church, only a deep hole dark durt deopths light,in the hsrd work of medistion, and misspellings I am no holyy man, in the hsrd work of medistion .. I am there honest alone joined to all through thiswe see something, join tgether, past churches, any house of worship, and workd, walkig, zoom in cars, planes, land ho lopts og hosd go hop ho, be wrlcomed by cekebrity worshioppers, or whstever is going on in populastconsciopsness take .. and past it .. meet fur nithig .. meet fur this .. strange itch nits b / beno, no is it strange, pricks me with strange, shsrp objects, irrtitates working this no we get through it all thst ti whst it really is up ashead but with us all the way silent prayers to no other humsns words float oputsistsnce orayers though/ outdistance, they are good keep praying for me, I will pray for you, and this .. no need to reply please dint reply uypi will reck it reaccess it enfold it love4
We are just there
Joined in whess this
I need peace sluredand contemplstion not drunk just piece together bloweing it apart top assemble farther ahead but no known repetitive sequence no known./ with thst, long peasce and contemplation, meditation boke my bsck in ego, in being unable to be calm and take time repeat what isand thst is good – I hsve time now, stretching on/ are these prayers my strange dirty reprehensible self prayers open light
It is good the poem has open streets
I sail through
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//
Meet on it up ahead I can’t say anything to you, you can’t say anything to me, still we are okay, the fraught feelings of yesterday are not there, we are silent mostly, did you challenge me say this work was crackpot, I held my ground even though there were no friends around, or we sail through, open streets, dirty poem strangely wholesome
Make it there. Have done the right things.
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